I LOANED MY SWORD TO ORI

I loaned my sword to Ori, he brought it back today,
in four and twenty pieces, and here's what he had to say:

"Those Irishmen, they're drinkers," But that was no surprise.
"And they brew this mighty whiskey that brings tears unto the eyes.
Well, we struggled through the evening, three Irishmen and me,
and walking back I missed the track and stumbled in the scree.
I must have landed on the flat or it would have been my bane
for when I awoke I saw your sword was neatly cleft in twain.
I then sailed on to England where I met this Saxon knight
and he laughed out loud when he saw your sword so we just had to fight.
Well, when my wounds were healed I saw your sword and it was a sorry sight;
the hilt was broke, the pommel too, and the handgrip wasn't right.
In Normandy I saw a herd of cattle on a hill
and I thought to take my pick of them when I heard this voice so shrill.
A farmer's wife laid on me with this fork for pitching hay.
Oh, I wasn't hurt, but oh your sword, had seen a better day.
So now I bring it back to you a little worse for wear
but from my tale a fool could see I treated it with care.
But when next I come a-seeking for the borrow of a blade
kindly loan me one that is a little better made."

Have a care when someone seeks to borrow what he lacks
but it won't be good old Ori, for I killed him with my axe.